There is a Plan...

I have faith.  Sure I do.  I honestly believe God will work things out.  I just prefer he detail for me exactly how he plans to get me from Point A to Point B.  Funny thing, though: he never does.

I little over a year and a half ago, Nathan stepped out in faith and accepted the associate ministry position at Pleasant View Church of Christ, following God's call toward preaching ministry.  You can read more about that here.  That position has been a proving ground of sorts, an opportunity for Nathan to learn and grow as a minister and hopefully lead some others in growth as well.  He has been blessed to have some fantastic mentors really pour into him, teach him, lead him, admonish him, and encourage him.  He has had opportunities to preach and teach.  He has developed a website and a prayer ministry and started leading the worship team.  He has been privileged to work with some spectacular youth, some of the most talented, goofiest, most sincere kids on this planet.  And he has been humbled to serve alongside the mommies and daddies who raised such kids.  My children have been taught by some of the most creative ladies I've encountered.  My boys cheer when it's time to go to church.  They love it, and that's thanks to the love of these volunteers and staff.  I have been challenged and encouraged by generations of ladies who have taken the time to share their lives with me and allowed me to share my life with them.  We have been blessed.

But we've also been surprised.

When Nate left the Garrett church to work at Pleasant View, we really thought we were in it for the long-haul.  The church had a plan that when the senior minister retired, Nathan would move into that role.  But there was always a clause, an asterisk that said they could decide to keep him in the associate role if they felt that was best.  Al will be retiring soon, and the leadership decided it would be best for Nathan to stay in the associate role.  Their reasons are sensible and God-led.  The church, in order to move forward the way she needs to, will need more of an administrative-style minister.  Nathan is not that kind of minister.  He is relational.  He could stay in the associate role and continue working with youth, families, and worship.  But there's that call on his heart, that call that started years ago.  God called Nate to be a senior minister.  Point A, Point B.

There is a plan.  God knew how all this would work out from the beginning, long before Nate accepted the position at Pleasant View, long before the leadership announced he would not be the senior minister, even long before Nate knew he WANTED to be a senior minister.  While at Pleasant View, there have been some pieces that just haven't quite fit.  Our house didn't sell.  We thought it would.  We wondered if God was wanting us to be patient, or if he was wanting us to step out in faith and move anyway.  We waited.  We wondered why, if we were following God, he seemed to be holding us back.  Sometimes it felt a step...off.  We believed God called Nate to Pleasant View for a reason, but we also believed he had been called to senior ministry.  There was a plan.  We just didn't know what that plan was.

When the leadership at Pleasant View decided not to move Nate into the senior ministry role, he prayerfully started sending out his resume.  One church that was looking for a senior minister at the time was a small church in a small town in west-central Indiana.  Nate sent his resume on, not expecting much.  These things take time.

Practically right away, he received a call.  Then an interview.  Then another call.

The job was his if he was willing to accept it.

Pending a congregational vote in a week, Nathan will be the new senior minister at Ladoga Christian Church in Ladoga, IN, starting the first week of June.

God had a plan.  He did not tell me how he was getting me from Point A to Point B, or even what Point B would be.  But he knew.  Not once in all that time of uncertainty did we want for anything.  We had a house with more than enough space.  Cars to drive and gas to fuel them.  A babysitter who loved our kids and did housework so I didn't have to.  Friends who loved us and allow us to love them.  Income to cover our expenses.  Our needs have been met.  God has provided manna and required only that we gather for today and trust him to provide for tomorrow.  And he has.

This morning, our Sunday school class was studying the story of Joshua.  He saw the Promised Land and believed with real faith that they could take it, that God would lead them to conquer the giants so they could claim the land as God had promised.  But the people were afraid of those giants.  So they waited.  For 4 decades.

40 years.

God provided for them as they waited.  They had food.  Their shoes didn't wear out.  God was with them, day and night.  But 4 decades.

Joshua got to enter the Promised Land.  God delivered him to Point B.  The distance between was long, but God provided for Joshua and his people every step of the way.  If Joshua could wait 40 years, there's no excuse for my impatience.  God has no obligation to tell me how he'll get me from Point A to Point B.  He will.  That's enough.  And I truly believe his version of Point B is far better than any I could imagine for myself.

Nathan and I have run the numbers dozens of times, several different ways, and it looks like I'll get to be a stay at home mom after our move.  LCC has a parsonage, and with that and Nate's salary package, it looks like we won't need a full-time income from me.  I have never been a stay at home mom.  I'm sure you can imagine how I feel about this opportunity.  I love my job and believe I'm good at it.  But I have hated that I can only give my family what's left over.  My health is a real challenge, so often by the time I'm home from work, I'm far from my best self.  My family has paid the price for my career, even though I've worked because I've HAD to.  Even with our fairly modest lifestyle, we've never been able to make it on one income alone.  We have always trusted that if God orchestrated our finances in such a way that I needed to work, that he had a purpose in that.  I've seen my teaching career as my ministry.  But by the same token, when God orchestrated our finances in such a way that I no longer needed to work, we immediately saw that God was giving me the blessing of time.  Of energy.  Of health.  Of family.  This is God's will.

My friend Mitzi once explained seasons to me.  I was a new mom and really struggling with the change in my role in Nate's ministry, that I wasn't serving as a youth sponsor or dorm mom anymore.  Mitzi explained that I was in a new season, a season of motherhood, and that like all seasons, it wouldn't last forever.  She said her season of motherhood had been a tough adjustment too, but now as a mother of grown children, her season had changed and she was serving busily again, and missing those days of young motherhood.  She said this was my season and to embrace it, because the season would change soon enough.  Wise words.

Now we're entering a brand new season.  Nathan's entering senior ministry for the first time.  I'm going to be a stay at home mom for the first time and will be stepping out of my career, at least for now.  We are leaving the community we've lived in for the bulk of our  married lives.  We learned to be adults here.  Our children were born here.  Our dearest friends are here.  But God is with us, day and night.  He's providing enough for today and will again tomorrow.  We are somewhere between Point A and Point B right now, and that's OK.  God has a plan.  He had one all along.  I'm blessed and humbled to be a part of that plan.  And I'm so excited to see what's next.

Let's have a conversation.

I've been thinking.  

Yesterday I had lunch with a lovely young lady.  She's insightful and kind, and her very nature is to want to help, heal, cure everyone around her.  She's 15 years old and wiser than most of us.  She said, "Everyone has holes they're trying to fill, and they're just filling them with the wrong stuff."

And I read this: http://www.perrynoble.com/2012/08/01/ben-jerrys-chic-fil-a-political-correctness/

(Seriously, take a minute and go read it. It'll be well worth your time!)

We know the answer, right?  Everyone has holes, and they're trying to fill them with the wrong stuff.  The right stuff is Jesus.

But somehow in the name of our Lord, we have managed to marginalize and outright hurt those who need Him the most.  I don't mean the whole Chick-fil-A thing.  That's not what this is about.  I mean we have this ability to pick out the sins that others struggle with but we do not so we can stand above those who are hurting and look down on them.  It keeps us safe.  Makes us feel holier.  And it's destroying this world.

Michael Patz described a conversation with a homosexual.  When the man found out Michael was a minister, he expected condemnation.  And why not?  What have we (Christians) collectively demonstrated?  That blog post got me to imagining.

Let's say you encounter a homosexual like Michael did.  Let's say that person responds to your Christianity like the person Michael described.  How could you respond?  How about this:

You: Look around you.  How many people here do you think have had sex outside of marriage?

Viewed pornography?

Lusted?

Envied?

Been unforgiving?

Loved money?

(you get the idea)

Did I condemn any of them?  Did I go yell at them?  Did I treat them with any unkindness at all?

Them: No.

You: Then why would I be any different to you?

 Everyone has holes, and they're trying to fill them with the wrong stuff.  Here's where you introduce Jesus.  

Wait, you mean you want me to bring Jesus into this conversation?

Yes, yes I do.

I've heard it said that people can argue the points of the Bible but cannot argue with your own story.  So here's what I recommend.

Introduce them to Jesus by introducing them to what Jesus has done for you.

Tell them your story.

Then listen to theirs.

 Everyone has holes, and they're trying to fill them with the wrong stuff.  The right stuff is Jesus.

We have marginalized, minimized, ignored, and outright condemned too many people.  

 It's time for us to step up and love.

Take a moment now.  Look around you.  Who is hurting?  Marginalized?  Minimized?  Ignored?  Condemned?

How about this:

 Everyone has holes, and they're trying to fill them with the wrong stuff.  The right stuff is Jesus.

Have a conversation.  Share your story.  Listen to theirs.

A Bittersweet Calling

Many of our dear friends know what's going on in our world right now, but we haven't really made it Facebook official or anything.  Nathan has been offered the Associate Ministry position at Pleasant View Church of Christ in Angola, IN.  On Aug. 14, he will present a trial sermon, and then the congregation will have an opportunity to vote to approve him.  Though we do not presume that he's already hired or anything, PVCC's bylaws required they give the congregation two weeks' notice of the candidate by name, so out of consideration for our First Church of Christ in Garrett family, we announced this to our congregation Sunday as well.

What a bittersweet season.  I blogged not so long ago about the blessing of hearing my husband preach and watching God mature him.  I've watched God tug at his heart and unfold this area of his ministry over the last couple years.  But Nathan was patient, careful, conscientious.  He didn't want to be responding out of his own ambitions or desires, whether that would mean to stay where we are or to step out on new adventures.  We are comfortable here, secure, well-loved...this is home.  Stepping out to something new is, for me, scary.  I'm timid about leaving my friends, and it took me SO LONG to develop these friendships due to my shy nature.  I'm apprehensive about trying to sell our home, about keeping it "show-ready" with my limitations and life with two young kids, about the repairs we'll need to do or the financial cut we'll take when it sells.  I'm so sad to leave people we love so very much.

But I'm also excited.  Nathan will have new opportunities in ministry that will challenge him, grow him, and let him use his gifts in new ways.  We'll get to look for a new house, which is fun and exciting too, and I LOVE to decorate, so starting over in that regard is so exciting I have trouble sleeping sometimes. And we'll be close, just 25 minutes north, so my friendships won't be over.  I get to keep my job and just get up early enough to make it to work on time.  And I have the opportunity now to make new friends and reach out to other women and families the way so many here have reached out to me.

The bottom line through all of this:  If God calls, answer.  In the Old Testament, there's a story about a young boy named Samuel.  The beginning of his life is pretty cool (and part of the PandaMania VBS if you or your kids have been a part of that this summer!) and worth checking out (see the book of I Samuel or this link http://www.dltk-bible.com/cv/hannah.htm).  But the part I'm focusing on tonight is a little further in.  In I Samuel 3, Samuel hears a voice calling his name, and he keeps running to Eli, the priest who raised him, to say, "You called me?  Here I am!"  It took Eli a while to figure out what was happening, but when he did, he explained to Samuel that GOD was calling him, and that he needed to say, "Here I am, Lord!" and listen to whatever God had to say.  Unfortunately, God's message for Samuel was one of warning and punishment for Eli (he had been wicked...), but MY point tonight is this: When God calls, answer.  I'm pretty sure whatever He's about to say is important.

In our case, God's calling to Nathan has been to step out toward preaching ministry, and though that means leaving so much that we love, it also means these next steps are sure to be pretty important.

So what are you being called to tonight?  What will it cost you?  Are you ready to answer?

Just Get Out of the Way!

Today I had the privilege of hearing a sermon delivered by my husband.  One of the greatest things about being married to a man who has devoted his life to ministry is listening to him preach.*

When I first met Nathan, he was actually unsure if he could be used by God.  He felt too imperfect.  He questioned his calling.  I finally had to verbally kick him in the hiney.  Below is a paraphrased version of my rant:

"If you keep wondering whether or not God can use you, you're going to get in his way!  He's called you to serve him, he's given you opportunities to serve, and you do it, but then wonder if you did any good!  Are you kidding me?!  Moses said he couldn't talk well enough.  Paul thought his past was too sinful.  Yet those men stepped up and served God.  Are you any different?  This is NOT about what you can or cannot do.  This is ALL about what God CAN do!  He created the world!  He hung the stars in the sky!  He created YOU!  He sent his son to die for you, raised him from the dead, and opened heaven FOR YOU!  Do you think he thinks you're not worth it?  When you question yourself like this, it's like saying all that sacrifice wasn't good enough for you.  And I know you don't believe that.  So shut up, step up, and let God use you.  Quit standing in his way."

OK, so I wasn't really that brutal.  But the gist is the same--he needed to get out of God's way.

Nathan was afraid of becoming too prideful if he was successful in ministry, so he looked for every flaw, every mistake, every mis-spoken word (and, as is true of most fledgling youth ministers, there were plenty).  But pride has never been Nathan's issue.  Once he accepted that it wasn't about him, he got out of the way, and God really started moving.

Since he was that skinny, unsure, barely-out-of-adolescance guy, he's grown into a man of God I truly admire.  He loves God, the Church, and the lost.  I'm grateful he loves me too.  And I am so thankful for the opportunity to sit in a service on a Sunday morning and listen as my husband leads me, and others, closer toward the God we love.

My husband would be uncomfortable with this post.  Remember his fear of pride?  Yep, still there.  He's practically addicted to humility.  But HE gives all the glory to God.  If he speaks well, it is because of God in him.  If his message cuts to the heart, it's because of God in him.  If he stumbles, messes up, mis-speaks, that's all him :)  But Nathan will give all the credit and praise to God.

But I'm his wife.  I get to praise my husband.  I get to be proud of him.  I get to admire him.  I get to love him.  And all because of God working through him.  That's a true privilege.

So while my husband is right to give all the glory to God and keep his own spirit humble, this wife is right to admire the man who has learned to step out of the way and let God move.

Nathan, I'm proud of you.


*If you want to listen to the sermon yourself, you can find it here: http://www.garrettfirstchurch.org/media/mp3s/2011/2011-06-26_service.mp3 .  The link contains the praise service as well.